19 February 2009

A brief pause

I'm a total mess. I did not expect to be so devastated by Curt's death, but, as my sister would have said "No matter where you go, there you are."

I have debated long and hard about what to say. He was a private person, but I'm not. And now he's gone.

Do I respect the dead? Can I take the fifth on that? Or say "Yeah, but not enough to shut up?"

So here I give you 25 things about Curt etc:

1. He loved the Lakers with an abiding, multi-decade long love.
2. I think from the old school Lakers, Michael Cooper was his favorite. Maybe because of the socks. Or the rebounds.
3. His favorite Chick Hearn expression was "Throws up a frozen rope."
4. We lived together for 6 years, the first 3 as BF/GF, then 3 years as just friends.
5. That caused some weird and hilarious circumstances.
6. Then he fell in love with our mutual good friend.
7. See #5
8. Then I got mad and jealous and mean and we did not have much of a relationship for a long time. All my fault.
9. Then we all reconciled, thank God.
10. He loved to play chess and could study books of chess moves for hours. He and his friend Cliff Bidleman would sit out on the front lawn, playing and not talking all afternoon.
11. He was a printer, first on paper, then silkscreening, then had his own silkscreening business with his wife.
12. When he read a book, he read deeply. He would learn all the characters and knew their motivations better than they did. While he read "Bonfire of the Vanities," he studied NYC maps to know where all the action happened.
13. He called toilet paper "buttwipe" and kleenex "snot rags." Our shopping list always cracked me up.
14. He really loved his mama. They were both a little OCD and loved to package things up and to organize. They cracked me up because they could talk fondly about containers for extended periods of time.
15. He was a decent cook. He made a mean Potage Bonne Femme - leek, potato and carrot soup. He added a dollop of honey toward the end and that made it really good.
16. One year we made chinese food for Thanksgiving. Not at all traditional, but it was good chow.
17. He looked good in hats.
18. He and my sister Laura really loved each other, even though she was a Bulls fan. I hope she is showing him around heaven.
19. He was not good with blood. Fainted at "Interview with a Vampire" and while having his blood drawn.
20. One of the biggest fights we ever had was when I tried to get him to waltz in public.
21. He had all the logos and lettering taken off his modified mountain bike and had the whole thing powder-coated white with just one small Schwinn emblem put back on. It was like a perfect stealth bike then.
23. He had 2 vehicles catch on fire and burn to the ground, 10 years apart, both after fueling at the 76 station on Laurel Lane and Broad Street. After that, he would never go to that station anymore.
24. He understood animals and they understood him.
25. I can't believe I will never hear him say "Well, Suebob," in that quiet voice again.

Thanks, everyone, for your kind wishes. This is not really my story but somehow I have inserted myself into the middle of it, as I am wont to do.

21 comments:

Ericka said...

i'm sorry. :-( he sounds like a good guy to know.

Working Girl said...

I'm sorry for your loss, Suebob.

Solo said...

I'm so sorry for that.
I'm sure he's a better man base on what you have said.=)
Keep on writing friend.

gael said...

You done us proud.

CharmingDriver said...

I am glad to learn more about your friend and if it helps you mourn the loss, keep telling his story. You're not inserting yourself into the story, he was part of your life and that is your story.

XOXOX

jaybird said...

So sorry for your loss.

super des said...

I'm so sorry. He is remembered well. *hug*

LittlePea said...

So sorry for your loss. Reading this made us understand all the more how loved he was by you. And talking/writing about it is healthy when in mouring. I'm sure he'd approve of all you've said with love :O)

Mayberry said...

It's your story too. And sharing it with us helps honor his memory in a really charming way. Containers! He and my MIL could have traded freezing strategy tips.

Gretchen said...

It is always devastating to lose somebody you've been that close to. Don't be too hard on yourself. 2 years ago my very distant ex was killed in a car accident and I was torn apart, so there you are.

flurrious said...

I'm so sorry.

Nancy said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Private or not, I think Curt would love the snippets of his life you shared with us.

meno said...

I believe it is your story, you lived with the man for 6 years.

I wish i had something better than i'm sorry to say.

Project Christopher said...

SueBob, while he may have been a private person (as I am in spite of my blog) If he was such a fan of the written word, I have to think he'd be honored by what you did here. I got two things out of it:
1 - I'm not the only normal guy who calls them buttwipe and snot rags.
2 - I've been debating over the next book to read myself. I'm going tomorrow to get Bonfire of the Vanities and a New York map....

And even though I don't think they allow gambling in heaven, I bet your sister and he have some game action planned... but no powers or divine intervention allowed. :)

Issas Crazy World said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

nonlineargirl said...

I am saddened by your loss.

Suzanne said...

I'm sorry for the loss of your friend.

g said...

So very sorry about his passing. You bring the vividness of his human-ness to us in this piece without violating his privacy.

Anonymous said...

We woke up to a terrible crackling sound, it was the metal of his truck expanding and contracting and finally melting as his truck was engulfed in flames. Paul ran out to help but Curt had it all under control, he stood by quietly hosing it down, hardly phased. Maybe that was his second burning so he was already familiar with the scene, or maybe it was just Curt who never got too ruffled. Funny guy he was! Great to see you Suebob, love your stories. Lorna

Anonymous said...

We woke up to a terrible crackling sound, it was the metal of his truck expanding and contracting and finally melting as his truck was engulfed in flames. Paul ran out to help but Curt had it all under control, he stood by quietly hosing it down, hardly phased. Maybe that was his second burning so he was already familiar with the scene, or maybe it was just Curt who never got too ruffled. Funny guy he was! Great to see you Suebob, love your stories. Lorna

Anonymous said...

I'm so very sorry for your loss. My heart is breaking for you.

Back to top