06 December 2008

Starchy Traveler

It was a Carbs in the Car kind of day in more ways than one.

YOU know Carbs in the Car, don't you? One of those busy days where you have to run around doing so many errands that you end up grabbing food wherever you can, and not good food, either, but the kind of food that would make Dr. Atkins put you in handcuffs and drag you off for a protein-style In-n-Out burger?

Carbs. Bready, lovely carbs. They are perfect for the car because they don't drip or squish or spill.

My carb-loaded day began with a Morning Glory muffin at Peets after swimming and ended 14 hours later with a Jalapeño-Cheese bagel (I KNOW a jalapeño-cheese bagel is a shondeh, shut up) when I picked up a bottle of Tanqueray (do NOT have a drinking problem, shut up again) at the grocery store on the way home from a Christmas party.

And if a pre-diabetic diet wasn't bad enough for my insides, I had to spread the love to my outer world as well.

I made a giant crock pot of chili for the party and was driving over there while it was still piping hot. I put the lid on the crockpot and put the whole thing in a bag and do you know what is coming?

OMG SUDDEN STOP! Tilty crockpot splashing happens, and suddenly there are beans up one side and down the other, and I have a feeling my car is going to have a lovely cumin and chipotle smell for a long, long time.

That's me, baby. Graceful AND talented. Why couldn't I just be smart like that other person and bring mini cans of Pringles to the potluck? (Not complaining! Just totally jealous that I didn't think of it).

Carbs in the car, carbs on the car. It's a lifestyle that few can pull off with the aplomb that I do. Sorry, world. I'm just special that way.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

So would you consider sharing that chili recipe?

the queen said...

So, did you lose all the chili to the car? If so, did you scrape it all along with a stray penny back into the pot and serve it anyway?

mar said...

*snort* stray penny!
i'm about to attempt a white bean chicken chili recipe, but i can totally see that happening to me. problem is, i'll be hoofing it to the grocery store in 10 degree weather in a coupla minutes. s has the car for the weekend.
also, dr atkins is my enemy. i love carbs.

elvie said...

You must be related to me. Only mine was lemon merangue pie. Not thought of putting it in a bag. So can you imagine the mess?
E

SUEB0B said...

I did not spill ALL the beans. Just ENOUGH beans, so no penny-scrapage was necessary.

Traceytreasure said...

Pringles? Seriously?

Wow!

I was wondering about the chili in your car..... Glad you didn't have to scrape it off the floor, or seat!!

Hugs!!
Maybe you could bring Rice Crispy treats next time!!
:)

Issas Crazy World said...

In & Out Burger and a Jalapeno cheese bagel? I think I just drooled on your site. Sorry for that.

Bagels in Colorado are horrible. I can barely stand to eat them.

flutter said...

Oh wonderful, now I want an in and out protein style...

Project Christopher said...

ROFL! I actually gasped out loud (and I'm managing a conference right now so the attendees all whipped their heads around)

oh yeah... that stop short chili explosion has happened to me MANY a time... maybe not with chili, but stop car/food flies happens.

will the chili give your car gas?? maybe that's a good thing :)

gael said...

I know, late comment here, but...
Elvie! Lemon Meringue Pie? Me too! The hostess was so excited about the pie that she put the mess-in-a-pie-plate in her fridge and opened the fridge, spoon in hand for days after.

And... My brother spent days making his amazing chili for a New Year's Eve party, only to have it knocked off the woodstove as soon as it got there. We just grabbed the ash shovel and put it back in the pot. Yum! What?

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