28 January 2008

So that's how they do it.

I was at an all-day work meeting and a box of See's Candy was being passed around.

The woman next to me carefully selected a piece and took a bite.

"Oh, my God, that's good!" she moaned.

She then put the other half of the piece on a napkin, where it stayed until the meeting was over 4 hours later.

She never ate the other half.

I could not have been more stunned if she had gotten up and done the Soulja Boy Dance.


I may be 40-something years old, but it had never once occurred to me to eat HALF of a piece of really good candy, a moan-worthy piece.

I told my friend Alicia this story and she said "Wow, if I found a piece of See's Candy I liked, I would be rooting around in the box for more of the same kind before someone else got them."

Exactly. You see why Alicia and I are friends. You can also see why we will never be mistaken for anorexics.

So that's how skinny people do it (yes, the woman who ate half the candy was what we used to call in high school "A pick"). They simply eat less. A lot less.

Crazy. Why didn't I ever think of that?

21 comments:

debangel said...

I would have been staring at that orphaned half-piece of chocolate all afternoon! That's something beyond willpower, that's like saying no to multiple orgasms. Maybe you should send her to that book club and see what happens..

Julie said...

We have people in our office who walk by homemade brownies without so much as a glance. I don't even have to see them...if I know they are in there, it is almost as if I can hear them calling me. Eating them just "shuts them up" so I can focus.

jessica said...

Here's the thing that all the people who slam us "ample sized" women (in particular) DO NOT GET - most people who are naturally thin simply do not LOVE food the way some of us do. Sure, there are some thin people blessed with great metabolisms who love to eat and can eat whatever they want and stay thin, and sure, there are thin people who really work at it, but for the most part, naturally thin people simply do not jones for food. My ex is like that - he can take food or leave it - and he has a perfect, tiny body. He doesn't have to work at it, he's not employing willpower, he simply does not care that much about yummy food.

And hey, that's great. The problem comes when people ascribe a positive personality to these people (they are better than fat people), and a negative personality profile to the rest of us (we are weak/gluttonous/ and just plain horrid because we are bigger).

Don't get me wrong - I'd KILL to be one of those "food - whatever" people. But I'm not. Every delicious bite I pass up in deference to the size of my belly makes me sad - just like missing multiple orgasms.

Wow, sorry for the rant - guess I'm feeling touchy this morning.

Maggie said...

Ah but Jessica is so right. You see food = delicious mouth watering yummy ergo it must be eaten. And therein lies the tummy. I used to be one of those metabolism people who could eat anything. And I've always loved food. Then my metabolism changed and learning willpower sucks. And any skinny minny who can eat whatever they want that tries to tell me I shouldn't be eating this or that, gets my two-eyed death ray stare.

Suzanne said...

The first thing I thought of when you mentioned it was still there four hours later was that I'd probably ask if she was going to finish it and then ask if I could have it. I'm with Julie. The food calls to me. In the past 10 years I've developed more restraint to sweets than I had in the past, but I still love anything sugary and anything cheesy. My goal is to hold myself to only one piece of yumminess. That said, I ate cookies for dinner on Sat. and about 4,246 Jelly Bellies. And it was good. No regrets.

Nancy said...

One of my coworkers is quite thin (not overly so, but nicely so) and she says she never diets, but just eats anything she wants "in moderation." Kind of like your coworker, I guess.

I just cannot fathom that. I mean, if I'm craving a chocolate chip bagel like the one sitting in front of me right now, I'm not going to settle for two bites. I'm going to chow down on the whole damn thing.

Laura said...

Wow. Never ate it. I read this for the first time a few hours ago... and I keep thinking about it.

I would have at least finished the piece. Come on... what would that have hurt???

As Homer Simpson once said... "I'm just trying to get into Heaven... I'm not running for Jesus."

Kelly said...

Who eats half a piece of delicious candy? Maybe she spared herself 25-30 calories. She could have burned it off by going up and down the stairs a few times. But then that would have been weird too, to indulge in a piece of candy and then feel compelled to burn it off instantly.

meno said...

What? You mean diet and exercise are the key to weight control?

Who knew?

super des said...

I would've shoved the whole piece in my mouth. If I didn't like it, I would have just frowned a little more while eating it. There is no "half piece" or "bite" in my vocab.

Amanda said...

I can do that (well, I'd probably have to eat the whole piece, but I wouldn't need another one), but I had to have gastric bypass surgery in order to be able to do it. I wasn't born with the ability to push the plate away, either.

Average Jane said...

I would be physically incapable of stopping myself from eating the whole piece of candy. In fact, I'd keep eating candy until I got over-sugared or shamed out of my piggishness by the disapproving looks of my colleagues.

Kizz said...

A four hour meeting? I'd never make it. I might, though, if I knew I was only getting one piece of chocolate and was going to have to sit there for four freaking hours, eat half when I got it and then force myself to wait for half the meeting to have the other half just so I could have something to look forward to.

Christina said...

No way. The woman had to be faking and really had no taste buds to appreciate good food.

I could NEVER eat half of a candy and leave the other half. Honestly, I'm one of those sorts that two hours into that meeting, I'd be leaning across and asking "Hey, are you going to eat that other half? If not, can I have it?"

And that is why I'm overweight.

Suzanne said...

Except that I have watched Des eat good food and stop eating when she is full, even if there is still, say, tiramisu in front of her... This is not a criticism, but validates Suebob's point that skinny people eat in moderation.

The Ex said...

That's cuh-razy. You'll never find me eating half a piece of See's. Even ones I don't like.

Count Mockula said...

I can eat half a See's candy -- if it's the marzipan one. That one sucks.

SUEB0B said...

I agree, Jessica. My skinny friend says she forgets to eat because it is "such a chore." Like it is washing the dishes or something. She has obviously never experienced farmhouse cheddar lust.

QT said...

Can i just say, as an "in-between" (not skinny, not obese)size person, that I will always allow myself "one" of whatever it is that I want. But half??? I could see cutting a bagel in half and only eating half, but a half a chocolate is just plain strange...

Staci Schoff said...

My husband is lean - and even at 40 still eats like a teenage boy. When we were dating he told me that he has to eat so much that sometimes he just gets sick of eating long before he gets enough calories.

How annoying is that? Thinking back on it, I can't even believe I agreed to marry him!

I could maybe, perhaps, stop at half a box of moan-worthy candy, but definitely not half a piece!

LiteralDan said...

I could leave a piece of See's candy if it was unspectacular (as I find many of them to be), but I don't think I could leave a piece of Fannie May

Overall, though, I am also just not built to not look forward to meals and greatly enjoy such surprise treats.

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