It is catalog season. I yanked a big slippery fistful out of the mailbox today.
After Eddie Bauer (Motto: "We'll make you look like a big ol' butch lesbian or your money back") they all had 2 names. Hearth and Home. Wind and Weather. Night and Day. Buttocks and Bollocks. That sort of thing.
The problem is that I am not a catalog person. I can slaver over the descriptions like anyone else: "Made of butter-soft Carthiginean leather and hand-sewn by a family of dwarves who have inhabited the magic Brillig hills for over 30 centuries."
I can pick items out and tear out order forms, carefully working around the staple in the middle.
Then I get to calculating the shipping, and it all goes to hell. The melt-in-your-mouth caramels that are handmade on Whimsy Bean Island look great at $14.95 a pound, but I just can't see paying $8.95 for shipping on top of that. I think "Damn, I could make my own caramels!" and start researching caramel recipes.
I never actually MAKE any caramels, and no one actually gets any presents from me, but at least I didn't shell out $8.95 for shipping.