This one for Meno, who says she loves it when jerks get their due:
Scene: major airport
A man berates a ticket agent in the rudest possible manner. The ticket agent keeps his cool and is extremely polite and professional. The man stalks off in a huff.
My friend JFE: Wow, that was amazing. That guy was such a jerk and you were so calm. How do you do it?
Ticket agent: Oh, that's easy. He's going to Philadelphia and his luggage is going to Atlanta.
That, my friends, is why you should try to be nice to the little people. Kindness pays, and so does jerkness. Just in different ways.