1. If Subway bakes their own bread, why don't they make it taste good while they're at it? I can't figure out why anyone ever eats there.
2. I am willing to let people merge into traffic, or walk in front of my car as I am driving in parking lots. But I do expect the little wave. If you can't bother to give me the little wave, you may find me yelling "Where is my little wave, huh, beeyotch??"
3. I honestly believe that I have watched people answer their cell phones in almost every possible circumstance. These include:
- At the cashier at the grocery store (all the time. Losers.)
- At a symphony performance
- During a poetry reading (and it was the reader - no, I am not making this up.
- A boy texting over his girlfriend's shoulder as he held her in his arms in a public display of affection
- At a funeral. Yes, I watched it happen. Is there NO circumstance important enough to not take a call?
4. In a similar vein, today at our family reunion, my mother, my nephew's wife and I were sitting around chatting. I watched, stunned, as my nephew's wife got her iPod out, slowly untangled the cords, and inserted the ear buds. I guess she was telling us that the conversation was over. I know the first rule of etiquette is "Adults don't correct the behavior of other adults," but still, I was truly tempted.
5. My space bar is all cattywumpus. It only works about 60 percent of the time. I am going to try and de-gunkify my keyboard. Please bear with me in the mean time.
6. Still with the fireworks. Every single night someone shoots off just enough to make the dog hide under my chair. She is a BIG dog, too. I may have to find some more stuff to give away to keep from swearing about this sh*t.